First Impression

I had a meeting with a new contact today. I never met this person before and while I wasn't nervous about my objective for the meeting or the subject matter, one thing keep eating away at my confidence.

My impression.

We all know 1st impressions go a long way. We size up and are sized up with 15 seconds of meeting someone new. Though 1st impressions aren't always accurate, they are impactful. They help us categorize our world. They determine how we will interact with people going forward. They contribute to the image we hold.

Let's face it. An impression is a underlying feeling or opinion we have about a person. We don't know why we like or dislike someone new. We just do. And that impression is a building block. 

So this was on my mind before my meeting. What impression will this person have of me?

Truth be told, I was in complete conflict. I was trapped in this internal conflict between forcing an impression and yielding an impression. When we force an impression, you put on the right clothes, rehearse the right small talk opener, plan the exact spots to name drop or highlight how great you are. All in an attempt to force others into having the impression you want them to have. When you yield an impression, you commit being authentic. You let go trying to influence their thinking in ways that aren't yours to influence. 

If you have a job interview, influence them with your punctuality, manners,skills, training, and record of success. If you are making new friends, influence them with your sense of humor, caring nature, and knack for having a good time.

I've learned one thing about impressions. They are outside of my ability to control. I can't force a favorable one. I can't control what someone thinks of me and trying to is a complete waste of time.

Though I wrestled with it for a while, I finally decided to let it all go and be in the moment. Regardless of the outcome, I made a BRAVE choice...and that is an accomplishment.

Wholeheartedly me,

Julia